Dear girl in her 20s,
I am begging you to not take the people around you for granted, no matter where you go and where you end up. Keep your promises, create healthy boundaries, have a balanced life, be consistent, follow through with your word, forgive and move on, let go when necessary, be okay with mistakes for yourself and for others, ask for help when you need it, don’t try to do things alone, don’t allow one thing to be all you are…love those around you fully and as if today’s the last day you get to love them. These are things I am reminding myself now.
For the past few years of my life, I have been non-stop studying, working, studying, working, learning to cope with the transitions of being in my 20’s, and I’ve lost my way. I’ve honestly lost myself in so many ways. That being said, I have taken life, relationships, people all for granted. My heart hasn’t stopped beating in warmth or love within my interactions on a day-to-day, but it’s unconsciously stopped recognizing the importance of the world around me in its entirety. I have forgotten who I am and who the people around me are. I am a blessed individual, and it’s taken me too long to know that.
I used to believe that my job, my studies, my work defined me, but as I’ve taken this hiatus from all of that, I’ve gotten a true sight of myself, and now that all of those things are stripped away, there seems to only be a skeleton of someone who once was much more vibrant and alive in other ways. Someone had once told me I have a one-tracked mind, so when my mind is set on something, you really can’t pull me away. It couldn’t be more true as I look back on who I once was. However, the terrible thing is that I am a one track mind in the moment, in that phase. Once that phase is over, I move on and begin again, and forget the people and the things I learned prior and I have forgotten a lot of you along the way, without ever intending to. But alas as I moved on, of course, I couldn’t expect .
Why have I had such a random epiphany? Well, in loss, I guess we tend to be reminded of the important things.
Today I found out someone I knew had taken his own life, and it absolutely broke me. It won’t seem like it when you see me, but I am devastated – not because I necessarily knew this young man well but because he was so young. He was too young to have known that he might have a longer, more beautiful life, if he held on, or maybe not…I don’t know. I won’t ever know, but I wish I could have said something to him or had known the heartache he had been feeling or the inner struggles he was experiencing. I just wish I had known. I wish someone had known and had reminded him that he was just simply a wonderful human being.
Life is too short. We are all too young. I wish I didn’t have to see people go in order to learn things, but now I’m imparting what I’ve learned to you. I’m sure you have learned or will learn better than I have.
Another girl in her 20s